Thursday, April 18, 2013

Survivor: Caramoan - LEGO R US - 26.10

Once again, it is time for my all-Lego recap.  I was asked this week how such an odd combination came about, & the easy answer is that I love, to an obsessive degree, both Survivor & Lego.  I tweeted a while back that my favourite mediums are song & Lego, & that's completely true.  Don't think a Survivor musical is out of the question, because it's half-written in my head, from this season alone.  Look for songs such as the hardcore metal/Christian rock mashup "Piss In The Beans (I want to be a Good Man)", the acoustic "Which blonde is that?", the party anthem "Diarrhea Fest", the Phillip solo "Here are your Stealth R Us Nicknames" which has no less than 4 reprises, the touching duet "Hold Up, Bro", & power ballad "The Tribe Has Spoken" (feat. Tata & The Tarsier Choir).  The Cochran character gets a prog-rock opus filled with his verbatim confessionals.  The intermission features the actual Shamar sleeping on stage while Matt performs BMX tricks around him.  IT WILL BE A HIT.

*Update: Along with adding links to the Vines I made of each song, a full-length version of Hold Up, Bro is here & available on iTunes. Lisa Ferreira & Matthew Willcott - Hold up, Bro

But the truth is, the Lego recap started because of something Coach said during the first season I recapped - South Pacific.  We saw a conversation where Coach explained to Cochran who everyone on the tribe would be if they were Greek gods, & that seemed like a really fun game.  (It is - have you guys seen the tweets about Survivor Caramoan as Breaking Bad characters?  I was giggling all night.)  So I thought I'd play Coach & cast the Survivors as Lego minifigures.  And it's evolved from there.  Now let's get to this season's Lego...

After last week's thrilling Tribal Council that saw Malcolm play Reynold's idol instead of his own, those 3 Alpha Beta boys are left alone in the dark while Stealth R Us debriefs.

High-Five it out, bros.

Stealth R Us agrees to continue with the mission at hand.  No need to abort due to the possibility of an idol coming into play.  They "Stealth R Us" on it, like all spy organizations do.

"S R Us!"

Cochran doesn't put his whole heart into the team-building exercise.  Perhaps it brings back painful memories of the last Survivor circle he was forced to be a part of.

Dear heavenly Father...

Phillip & Cochran are discussing Dawn's game, & whether or not they still see her as unbeatable in a Final 3 (they don't), when we hear Dawn wailing for Brenda.  The "accident" CBS has been hyping is finally here.  Even my satellite guide said "An accident threatens a contestant's future in the game".  I was worried for Dawn.  Did something happen to her that would normally happen to Skupin, but unlike Skupin, she would never recover as quickly?

Hey! I was on my way to deliver a package! Now it will be a few hours late!

Nope.  Turns out Dawn is LOSING HER SHIT because a long time ago, she lost her bottom teeth after an actual accident.  Her false teeth were on a retainer & somehow fell out of her mouth, into the water.  Dawn is freaking out to the point of hysteria, & asks Brenda to help.  Brenda retrieves them no problem & for a second, I think I see scales.  Maybe she really is a mermaid, like I hypothesized last week?

Dear Dawn, nobody is going to think anything awful about you.  Nobody thinks you're elderly or have poor dental hygiene, or anything.  I'm not going to harp on the crying, because I'm a big fan of crying.  I just wish Dawn had taken the opportunity to be a spokesperson of sorts.  I'm sure there are many people who have recently lost a tooth one way or another, who would have appreciated knowing that it would all be okay.  That they wouldn't have to quit Survivor because of a few missing teeth - maybe they could even be proud of it, & wear their imperfections like a badge of honour.  Come on, Dawn.  Show us that smile again.  Don't waste another minute on your crying.

Off to the Reward Challenge where Survivors will be divided into 2 teams before playing a similar challenge to one from last season: a race through obstacles, collecting bags of balls which will be thrown into tall baskets.  First team to get all their balls in their basket wins an afternoon at a resort & a feast with all the fixin's.  Malcolm uses Penner's strategy from last season which was later revealed to be Carter's idea, but which was really Penner's idea all along.

Just an excuse to play with Penner's LEGO, you say?  Yes.  Jealous?

Malcolm takes a long time to find the last bag for his team, & it costs them a lot of time.  Probst quickly forgets that, as he berates Sherri, on the Orange team, for taking her time on the balance beams.

You try balancing on the ground with those suckers, Probst.

Then poor Sherri gets stuck in the rice, & there's no holding those girls back now.

Yelled at by Probst, censored by CBS.

That's not the only attention the Orange girls get from the camera, for what is an episode of Survivor without the requisite shot of Brenda's ass?

The purple team wins, & Reynold, Erik, Phillip, Cochran, & Dawn head to their reward, where a beef, chicken & seafood feast is laid before them.

Bonus table of a green apple in a bowl of oranges!

Cochran says in a confessional that it was more food than they could have ever eaten, but he knows how important the protein is.  "This is the sort of energy I need to be able to go into challenges & continue being the challenge monster I think I've proven myself to be.

John Cochran: Challenge Monster & Ocean Throne Discoverer.

You would think Dawn would be more excited about the food, now that all her teeth are back, but she's all about the shower, while Phillip doesn't even realize it's there.

Back at camp, Dawn is back to being paranoid, thinking Andrea's going to flip to Alpha Beta.  She's been spending time with Malcolm, & he's been releasing The Hair.  I mean, who could resist?

Phillip agrees with Dawn that Andrea would be the first to flip, but he thinks Dawn is "a lunatic".  He then talks to Andrea about Dawn, saying "she lives in a world of total paranoia".  They haven't seen such insane behaviour since...well, you know...

 Dawn again needs a moment, & Cochran encourages her to cry it out.  But inside, you know he's all

After a good night's sleep, it appears Dawn does just that.  Stealth R Us meets & decides Reynold (or Reynolds, depending on who you're asking) should go next.  The 4 women will vote Reynold, the 3 men, Eddie.

Off to the Immunity Challenge, where Survivors will swim underneath a platform by pulling themselves along a rope, & then climb onto the platform where they will grab a ring which must be placed on a post on the other end.  There will be 2 rings in the first round, & 5 rings in the final round.  Phillip takes one look, & then declares he is sitting it out as he is uncomfortable.  There's only one way Phillip's doing this challenge.

Not an option?  I'm out.

Not participating in an Immunity Challenge is crazy.  Even if you think you're safe, you should be trying to prevent someone else from getting it.  NUTS.

Reynold & Andrea move on to the final round, as do Malcolm & Brenda.  I'm a big fan of the underwater footage.  It looks cool, & also, my suspicion that Brenda is so comfortable in the water because she is a mermaid is finally confirmed.

It comes down to Reynold vs Malcolm, like always.  Reynold wins Immunity, & Stealth R Us can't be too pleased.

Back at camp, Reynold is laughing at Phillip, who chose to sit out of the challenge.  "I think it's sacrilegious to not even participate in a personal Immunity Challenge.  Especially if you have lions & gorillas tattooed on your body."

"Come on, man."

Phillip feels comfortable because he's in a majority alliance.  What could go wrong?  One idol between three guys is nothing.  Still, Stealth R Us decides to search for a hidden idol, as Alpha Beta is openly searching as well.

Like most hidden Immunity Idols, it doesn't take long before it is found.


Andrea & Dawn see Malcolm find the idol, so they report back to Stealth R Us.  Two idols between three guys?  Still not a problem.  They decide to stick to splitting the votes - this time between Malcolm & Eddie.

Torches lit on the way to Tribal Council is more visually appealing, so shut it.

Everyone is seated, & Michael, the first jury member appears.

Cheers, bitches!

It comes up in Tribal Council that Malcolm had found an idol, & he takes it out.  "Myself, Eddie, & Reynold are on the outs.  It's kind of, like we have the plague or something...but this is supposed to be a game, so we figured we'd do something about it, & tonight we're gonna try to."  He passes his other idol to Eddie.

Everyone is shocked & immediately starts whispering "Andrea" to each other.

Michael downs his whole bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon.

 Audiences everywhere are stunned, even the superfans.

Somewhere, Matt Bischoff stops in mid-air as he senses a shift in Survivor through his wizard's orb.

Now, there's a lot of speculation about whether this was the smart move or not.  Malcolm could have let Eddie go home, possibly saving both of his idols.  He could have approached a few Stealth R Us operatives before Tribal Council, to get them to flip.  Instead, he shocks everyone at Tribal Council, & announces that the 3 with Immunity are going to vote for Phillip.  Why Phillip?  Well, it seems like they just want to surprise everyone & have fun, so why not get rid of someone who is the most difficult to deal with & the least likely to flip to your alliance?

Though there's doubt Alpha Beta will vote the way they said they would, & also the possibility that an idol might not even be played, Phillip declares Operation Vote Split still a go.  He repeats, it is still a go.  Even if he goes home.  With that, it is time to vote.

Both Eddie & Malcolm play their idols, & Probst reads the votes.  After several for Malcolm & Eddie that don't count:

Yeah, that was me.

So, The Specialist, the Stealth R Us figurehead, is gone.  Whether or not this will make an impact in the alliance remains to be seen, but my guess is that things will go only more smoothly for Dawn, Cochran et al, & Alpha Beta have only bought themselves a little more time.

I hope you enjoyed the Lego - despite the permanent Lego imprints on my thumb, I had a lot of fun creating (& recreating) the pics.  Thanks to @robstaboobuzzer for censoring Lego Sherri, & to my family for stepping on Lego all week.

There will be no recap for the next 2 weeks, but like last season, there will be a short 2-for-1 recap before episode 13.  Check out a few of my favourite blogs in the meantime until I am back:
SuperJude's SuperBlog
Sarah Freeman

Let me know what you thought of the Lego recap below in the comments, on twitter (@MomofKai), or on this blog's Facebook page!

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Survivor: Caramoan - Hold Up, Bro - 26.9

Corinne was voted out at the last Tribal Council, but we don't get to see the usual returning-from-Tribal-Council night footage.  Instead, we go straight to the next morning, & it seems Corinne has released monkeys all around camp as her revenge for not making the jury.  We hear ominous chords reminiscent of Pink Floyd's High Hopes, & Corinne's ally Reynold is declaring a victory because he's still there.  Hanging with Eddie, Reynold comments Hey bro - there's totes a trend that our chicks get dismissed.  They joke about which girl to cozy up to/target next.  In a confessional, Reynold says "I am ironclad with my guys, with Eddie & Malcolm.  They know that we're unwaveringly trustful to each other."

Corinne's leaving has not put a damper on Malcolm's game.  He is now the only one who knows about his Idol, & he still has his Fans.  Somehow, he still has his Faves, too - they thought he was just going along with Corinne, I guess, because Phillip introduces him as The Enforcer to Sherri & nobody on Stealth R Us treats him like a traitor.  Phillip assigns Sherri the nickname of Tenacity after expressing how hot she is & OMG is this all role-playing foreplay for Phillip?

Sherri resists the urge to point to the ocean & ask "Is that a Hantz?" before running in the other direction.  She called Shamar her "Phillip" back in episode 2, saying "I get along with my Phil...I can stroke him, & I can put him back in place."  Now she has the real Phillip to be her Phillip, & she's looking forward to manipulating him.  Me too!  The one good thing about all the Shamar drama was watching how deftly Sherri the Shamar Whisperer handled him, & I have hated how invisible Sherri has been since the tribe swap.

Off to the Reward Challenge, where Survivors will be divided into 2 teams via schoolyard pick.  First team to get 4 balls into a net defended by 1 person wins a picnic lunch at the base of a waterfall they will rappel down.  That sounds like another challenge to me.  I'll just take the lunch, thanks.

The schoolyard pick results in super-uneven teams, but it doesn't matter because as long as the aim is high, the defenders have no chance of stopping the ball.  Maybe if the defenders were placed closer to the net, they would have been useful.  But we do get some great photos out of the challenge:


Jazz hands!

Unfortunately no Colton-esque toe touches.

The team of Reynold, Eddie, Erik, Michael, & Cochran wins.  Ecstatic to finally get a reward, Michael tries to celebrate with his best Esther Williams.

Will no one join him for a synchronized swim?

Malcolm is sad that for once, he had released The Hair for naught.

But is releasing The Hair ever really for naught?

At the waterfall, Cochran is out of his element.  "This is not something I do.  I rarely leave my apartment.  I rarely leave twitter."  That's right.  Cochran doesn't just promote Survivor on Survivor, he promotes his twitter on Survivor.  Inspiring.  After rappelling down the waterfall, the guys talk about how great it would be to make Survivor a sausage fest.  Reynold says - & I had to watch this several times to make sure I was getting this right - "Hope's gone, so there's nobody worth fucking anyways."

If this is incorrect, someone please let me know.  Otherwise, wow.  Douchey McTools of past Survivor seasons, I'm ready to bestow this season's title unto Reynold.  He then says something even more offensive to my ears: "let's bro down".  Cochran isn't having any of it.

"They think that emphasizing the testosterone unity between us, & We're men. We're men & we hate women & we're gonna you know, slap each other with towels in the locker room, & chug beer...that doesn't work with me, that doesn't appeal to me at all.  I don't want to be engaging in any sort of masculine tomfoolery with these numbskulls."

Usually Malcolm is savvy regarding tribal dynamics, but those frat parties with Alpha Beta must have weakened his abilities.  He has plans to scoop up those on the bottom of Stealth R Us, but incorrectly assesses one of the bottom players to be Dawn.  How has she managed to stay so close to Phillip without anyone else knowing?  First Julia, then Corinne, & now Malcolm have all confided their plans to Dawn, thinking her likely to want to improve her position.  Well done, Dawn.  Malcolm actually gets it all wrong, as he approaches Sherri as his other bottom player, not realizing that she has game, & he thinks Andrea is running the game behind the front that is Phillip.  Time to lay off the keg stands.

Sherri & Dawn discuss Malcolm's revelations with Andrea, & they decide to blindside him.  Phillip plays along too, assuring Malcolm they're splitting the votes between Eddie & "Reynolds".

Andrea & Eddie have a lagoon date, with both playing the other. Eddie says: "I just need to be dragged 2 or 3 more votes before I can get up on my own feet & start punching people."  All this, while romantic guitar plucking is going on in the background.  It's very soap opera.

Off to the Immunity Challenge, where Survivors are in the water underneath a grate while the tide rises.

No thank you.

Brenda, owner of a paddleboard company, wins this challenge without even knowing it.  She's so comfortable immersed in water I now suspect she's part mermaid.

Back at camp, Phillip throws things at Sherri's head while she tries to sleep.  In the woods, where Dawn seems to always be, she tells Malcolm she'll vote with him as long as she has proof of Reynold's idol.

"It's nuts! The fact that I'm coming back after Corinne's vote when I'm the person that gave the information on Corinne tells me that he's not dialed in."  Reynold shows Dawn the idol with a menacing warning to not screw him.  He says if he has reason to doubt her, he'll play it for himself.  Dawn does not take kindly to this & IMO, Reynold just made it a little easier for her to be cutthroat.

Eddie & Andrea talk about which way the votes are heading, whether or not Reynold has an idol, & if Andrea's name has come up.  They talk over each other & it goes on for a comically long time & it made me think of this:

Then suddenly Andrea is convinced she's going home & is in tears.

Knowing that her name has been mentioned, Andrea correctly assumes Malcolm is targeting her & scrambles to change the vote back to Michael, who for sure doesn't have an idol.  Dawn is frustrated because she did so much work to make this Malcolm blindside happen, & now they might not have this chance again.

More pressing: where did these headbands come from?  Malcolm's spares?

At Tribal Council, Michael says having a Fave voted out at the last TC gives him some hope.  Erik picks a bug out of Andrea's hair, which must have freaked her out even more.  Wouldn't you assume that's a signal for how to vote?  Maybe not, since it's coming from Erik, but I imagine it would be as nerve-wracking as a Boston Rob shoulder touch.  Speaking of Boston Rob - after mentioning Redemption Island several times, Phillip makes a statement directed at anyone thinking of flipping right now: "I think they're gonna find that they actually erred in their judgement because there's enough numbers still left, & enough smart people still here, & they'll figure that out, so what you thought was a brave move, you're gonna get flushed out. Goodbye."

Malcolm tries not to vomit.

When everyone has voted, Probst asks if anyone wants to play an Idol.  Uh, yeah.  Malcolm would like to...but does it have to be his?  Reynold stands up, & from behind him comes one lone call.  It is the call of the bro.

"Hold up, bro."

Malcolm tells Reynold, "They all voted for me.  You can tell.  That was what that whole story was about.  Give it to me, & we're in good shape.  I'm being dead serious right now."  Reynold pauses a moment, then does what he does best: he tosses the Idol right into Malcolm's waiting hands.  Malcolm gives Probst a look like he can barely believe he pulled it off.

Other reactions are varied.

Reynold seems unsure at first, but then remembers that he is "ironclad" with his guys.  They are "unwaveringly trustful to each other".

Probst reads the votes, & it's 3 for Andrea, 1 for Reynold (thanks, Bro!), but it seems Andrea made the wise decision with her scrambling to have votes changed to Michael, because he is voted out, & she remains safe.  Like last week's vote, I loved Michael & I'm sad to see him go.  But what a Tribal Council!

I have to say, with all the monkeys in this episode, I thought Malcolm would be going home because of the Matsing/Monkey connection.  This stunt ultimately didn't matter on this vote, but going forward, nobody will suspect that Malcolm has an Idol of his own.  He remains on solid ground with Alpha Beta, & while the Stealth R Us "operatives" must be affirmative on his treason (why else would Reynold give him the Idol), he has his own Idol to get him through at least 1 more vote.  If Reynold's Idol goes back into play now, Malcolm could potentially have 2 Idols at his disposal again, given that he is an Idol magnet.  Great episode.

This season has already led to an all-meme recap, & I'm excited that my all-LEGO Survivor recap is happening next week!  In the meantime, check out my past LEGO Survivor recaps, & I'll be posting a few pics on Facebook in advance, so don't forget to "like" the page.  You can follow me on twitter while you're there looking for Cochran, because he would want you to.  No tomfoolery.